I had a weird dream last night, or this morning rather,
in which I lost my left ear in an accident that was somehow
tied to the purchase of a purple denim jacket.

for some logic that was sensible in the dream but makes no sense
upon waking, the solution to this problem was to preserve my left ear,
remove my right ear (which only required four small cuts), and
re-attach it where my left ear had been. in my dream, I knew this
was possible because ms regina had done so in the face of a similar
dilemma.